Noticing.. and life

I'm noticing that i feel like i'm moving to fast with my life. i don't know why i want to but i do. I'm engaged to a man i feel will be by my side forever. YES! he has issues here in there like very selfish but not with me, he needs to learn how to relax and enjoy what around him... He is fiendish like crazy if he doesn't get weed he goes through withdrawal symptoms and he gets angry... I've been trying to help him not need it so much little by little... he can go for 2 days without it before it use be he couldn't go the evening without it.


I feel Happy that i can help at other times i just wish he was not addicted and didn't have friends who smoked every moment of the day. My fiance has been with me for 2 years well in May it will be 2 years. We arent planning to get married till next year or the end of this year. I am afraid that this relationship will fall apart. So maybe counseling....  not sure... 


I am also thinking before i get married i do what i want to do like clubbing, and pamper myself  all the way i know when i get married i can do this too but still im going to be the modern wife where we do things together not that i have to do the laundry and cooking and cleaning thats too much work. Maybe when i have kids i can do some of that but for now nooo wayy :)


 I love him so much and i cant wait to be a Mrs. very soon. 
Looking for places for us to live in hopefully i find the one i want in Malibu <3 

part 2

SO filling you in on what exactly happen
Well took my father to court and He got probation thats it. i want a relationship with him but i cant cause he denies sooo messed up right!!
well now i go to counseling and its lame smh

wow life is life i wish i was 4 again the easy life.

Denial

So the other day My grandmother calls and says you need to do something! You know your father didn't do that to you.....I asked "What do you mean? How random is this grandma" I set my head down on the table...
2 years later and my family still doesn't believe me, I Went through hell and back to do what i had to do but no one believes me the courts and attorneys did but the people who counted the most my family did not. It hurts so much just knowing that they dont believe me... I would never lie about something so serious why would i put my family through the pain and suffering... My grandma and step mom are very much in denial on what happened.. till my dad says the truth I am not going back to that family... Even though it hurts so much.... I will explain in my next blog why theres so much pain, denial, and anger...

Your suppose to trust this person with your life until they abuse it who do you turn to then....

My First Blog

How to start i really don't know, my first time blogging... sooo i will start by saying all my blogs will be good (happy) or really sad life brings its ups and downs don't be surprised in what you will see... its life i will never sugar coat anything because life is just life.

Well enjoy:)